The Kimiya Healing Podcast

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How to Heal Your Wounded Feminine Energy

When our feminine energy flows freely we feel like a powerhouse of creativity and mystical insight. We birth new life, we nurture and feel nurtured by life itself. Deep within our womb space we feel the forces of creation inviting us to spin our dreams into reality. Feminine energy is a fierce river of intuitive wisdom, intimately intertwined in our bodies and wombs. Feminine energy exists within every living thing, regardless of gender, the life force of the creative spin is the movement behind all that exists.

But what happens when this sacred energy gets wounded?

Wounded feminine energy makes us feel disconnected, stagnant, stuck, numb, fearful of our emotions, reluctant to connect to our body and womb and doubting our own intuitive power. It can lead to hormonal imbalance, physical womb conditions, fertility issues, chronic health conditions and and uncertainty about how to move forward.

In this blog post I will discuss how feminine energy gets wounded through childhood trauma, ancestral patterns and collective structures and how we can heal and reclaim the true divine power that lies within all.

How Wounded Feminine Energy Manifests in your Life

  1. Disconnection: A sense of detachment from your authentic self and a feeling of being out of touch with your body and emotions. This can also lead to dissociation and depersonalisation.

  2. Self-Doubt: Constant questioning of your worth, abilities, and decisions, leading to a lack of confidence in your own voice and intuition. This can lead to guilt shame cycles and strong feelings of being a victim to your own life.

  3. People-Pleasing: A strong inclination to prioritize others' needs and desires above your own, often at the expense of your well-being and personal boundaries. This can lead to toxic relationships and patterns of codependency.

  4. Emotional Imbalance: Frequent mood swings, difficulty regulating emotions, and a tendency to suppress or ignore your feelings altogether.

  5. Lack of Self-Care: Neglecting your own needs, whether physical, emotional, or spiritual, and struggling to prioritize self-care practices that nourish and replenish your energy. This can make it hard for you to self regulate and also to receive both emotionally and financially.

  6. Perfectionism: Holding yourself to unrealistically high standards, constantly striving for perfection, and feeling inadequate or unworthy if you fall short.

  7. Fear of Vulnerability: Avoiding vulnerability and maintaining emotional walls as a means of self-protection, which limits authentic connections and intimate relationships. This can make it hard for you to feel safe with other people and can lead to isolation and disconnection which can worsen your mental health.

  8. Sensitivity to Criticism: Feeling deeply affected by criticism or rejection, taking it personally, and internalizing it as a reflection of your self-worth.

  9. Suppressed Creativity: A stifled expression of your creative potential and difficulty accessing your imaginative and artistic abilities.

  10. Overwhelm: An ongoing sense of being overwhelmed, juggling multiple responsibilities, and struggling to find balance, leading to exhaustion and burnout. This can affect your adrenals and kidneys and lead to longer term health issues.

How Wounded Feminine Energy Manifests in your Physical Body

  1. Chronic Tension: Wounded feminine energy can often manifest as chronic tension and tightness in various parts of the body, such as the neck, shoulders, and jaw. This physical tension mirrors the emotional and energetic constriction that arises from suppressed emotions and stress. 🎧 Listen to: Why your physical body is vital to your spiritual expansion

  2. Digestive Issues: The gut is known as the "second brain" and is deeply interconnected with our emotional well-being. Wounded feminine energy can contribute to digestive issues such as bloating, indigestion, and irritable bowel syndrome (IBS), reflecting the impact of emotional and energetic imbalances on our physical digestion. 🎧 Listen to: Why you need to trust your gut

  3. Reproductive System Disruptions: The reproductive system is closely tied to feminine energy, and imbalances in this area can be indicative of wounded energy. Menstrual irregularities, intense menstrual cramps, fertility challenges, or hormonal imbalances may arise, highlighting the need for healing and restoration in the feminine energy flow. 🎧 Listen to: How to reconnect with your womb after trauma

  4. Fatigue and Low Energy: Wounded feminine energy can drain our vitality, resulting in chronic fatigue, low energy levels, and a lack of enthusiasm for life. This physical exhaustion mirrors the emotional and spiritual exhaustion that stems from carrying the burden of unresolved wounds and suppressed energy. 🎧 Listen to: The key to healing the root causes of your condition

  5. Physical Discomfort in the Chest Area: As the heart center, the chest can be particularly affected by wounded feminine energy. Physical discomfort in this area, such as tightness, heaviness, or pain, can reflect emotional blocks, heartache, and unresolved emotions that need to be addressed and released. 🎧 Listen to: Replay: Sacred heart healing

5 Sources of Wounded Feminine Energy

  1. Our relationship with our mother: Our mother is our first experience of safe attachment, of nurturing and of safely receiving love. We learn how to be in our feminine energy by emulating how our mothers move. When our mothers were emotionally suppressed, restricted, living in fear, unable to express themselves, scared of their own power or holding the masculine polarity and over functioning, we can struggle to safely embody our feminine energy. This is because we have no neurological map of how to do it.

  2. Our relationship with our father: Our father is our first experience of presence, holding, being provided for, being loved unconditionally, being protected and therefore being allowed to blossom and be seen in our feminine energy. When our fathers are absent, abusive, violent or emotionally unavailable the deep knowing that we are held by a supportive web of love deep within is not there. We can struggle to let go, surrender, take risks, believe in love and trust our own emotions. We can also over compensate to try to win masculine love and affection pushing us further out of the feminine magnetism.

  3. Our parents' feminine-masculine dynamic: Our first experience of the polarity between feminine and masculine energy and what they stand for and mean begins with our parents. We saw things growing up, their relationship, their actions, their interactions and we absorbed the energy from the family constellation. It is common for there to be either toxic dynamics, high levels of incompatibility, physical or verbal abuse or inverted gender roles where the woman has had to take on the role of provider AND nurturer to maintain the family system because the father is absent either physically or emotionally. We learn unconsciously, the patterns of our parents.

  4. Our ancestral history: Deep in our ancestral history are patterns around masculine feminine roles. When we examine our feminine ancestry in particular, we might find that the women were always silenced or kept hidden, their voices suppressed in the name of culture or religion. We may find that the women were all neglected by their own parents, who perhaps preferred boys and gave them more resources. Whatever the level of feminine wounding in our ancestral history, it plays through unconsciously into our field.

  5. The Collective Consciousness: We exist in this collective field of consciousness where we absorb and unknowingly recreate systems and societal norms. These systems are not often supportive of the feminine energy. For example, globally we have collectively created and unconsciously enabled a patriarchal capitalist system. This has resulted in a society where gender inequality and economic disparities reinforce each other. Women and marginalised groups often face systemic barriers to accessing equal opportunities, fair wages, leadership positions, and wealth accumulation. This level of injustice is often felt deep in the collective feminine field. Wounded feminine energy can manifest as a result of societal expectations, broader cultural conditioning, and systemic biases present in the patriarchal capitalist system.

3 things that keep us trapped in wounded feminine energy:

  1. Unresolved Childhood Trauma and Nervous System Dysregulation: The lingering effects of unresolved childhood trauma can cast a shadow over our ability to connect with our bodies. Fear takes root in our nervous system, hindering the vital connection between mind and body. Releasing this trauma is essential to restore our innate feminine power. 🎧 Listen to: Replay: Sacred heart healing

  2. Sexual Trauma, Womb Blocks and Spiritual Disconnection from our Womb: A blockage in feeling and connecting with the subtle forces of our feminine power resides in our womb. When this sacred space is wounded, we may struggle to tap into the deep wellspring of our feminine essence. It is through acknowledging and healing this trauma that we unlock the full potential of our creative and intuitive abilities. 🎧 Listen to: Stages of inner child healing

  3. Fear of our Own Emotions and Intuitive Ways of Knowing: Fear and resistance towards our own emotions can shackle our feminine hearts, impeding the natural flow of emotional energy. Society often undermines the significance of emotional expression for the feminine essence. Yet, embracing and honoring our emotions allows us to experience profound healing and restoration. 🎧 Listen to: Step by step process to identify buried emotional pain

These three traps work in tandem, reinforcing one another and perpetuating a cycle of wounded feminine energy. However, by bravely facing our childhood trauma, healing our womb space, and embracing the power of emotional flow, we break free from these constraints. The journey towards wholeness and empowerment beckons us to reclaim our authentic feminine essence.


Sources of Wounded Feminine Energy

Our early childhood experiences shape our understanding and perception of feminine energy. How we view femininity and the feminine aspects of ourselves are often informed by our upbringing, interactions with primary caregivers, and societal norms. If we grow up in an environment where feminine qualities are devalued or dismissed, we may internalize this message and view these traits as weak or unworthy. This can lead to a disconnection from the feminine aspects of ourselves and create wounds that affect our sense of self-worth and ability to form healthy relationships.

On the other hand, if we are raised in an environment that values feminine energy, we may have a more positive relationship with these traits and feel empowered by their expression. It is essential to recognize the impact of early childhood experiences on our relationship with feminine energy and work towards healing any wounds that may exist.

Why Our Mother Matters in Shaping Our Understanding

The relationship between a child and their mother is often the first significant bond they form in their life. As a result, our mother becomes our primary model for understanding and embodying feminine energy.

How our mother expresses femininity, or perhaps, how she suppresses it, can have a profound impact on our relationship with our own feminine energy. It can affect how we view femininity, how we relate to other women, and how we perceive our worth as individuals. In this context, exploring the impact of our relationship with our mother can provide valuable insight into our understanding of feminine energy and our ability to heal any wounds that may exist.

When our mothers are disconnected from their feminine energy, it can impact our understanding and relationship with this aspect of ourselves. If a mother is unable to connect with her own feminine energy, she may not be able to model healthy expressions of it for her child. This can lead to confusion and an inability to fully embrace and embody the feminine within ourselves. Children may also internalize the belief that feminine energy is something to be avoided or suppressed, leading to a disconnection from this aspect of their identity. Additionally, when mothers are disconnected from their feminine energy, it can create a sense of emotional distance or unavailability in the parent-child relationship, which can further impact the child's ability to form healthy attachments and relationships later in life. Therefore, it is important for mothers to work towards connecting with their own feminine energy to provide a positive and healthy model for their children to follow.

How Our Parent's Relational Dynamic Impacts Our Understanding of Feminine Energy

The relationship between our parents can have a significant impact on our understanding and relationship with feminine energy. Children learn about relationships and gender roles through observing their parents' interactions and behaviors. If a child grows up in an environment where the mother is constantly disrespected or undermined by the father, they may internalize the message that feminine energy is weak and unimportant. This can lead to a disconnection from the feminine aspects of themselves and a belief that relationships are meant to be imbalanced and unhealthy.

On the other hand, if a child grows up in an environment where there is a healthy balance of masculine and feminine energy, they are more likely to view relationships as partnerships based on mutual respect and equality. This can lead to a greater appreciation for the value of feminine energy and a more positive relationship with these aspects of themselves.

It is important to recognize the impact of our parents' relationship on our own relationship with feminine energy and work towards healing any wounds that may exist. This can involve exploring and understanding our own beliefs and patterns in relationships and seeking support from a therapist or other healing resources.

20 Examples of how the Mother Wound Affects Our Feminine Energy

  1. Growing up in a family where the mother is emotionally unavailable or neglectful

  2. A family where the mother is physically absent due to work or other commitments

  3. A family where the mother is overbearing or controlling

  4. A family where the mother is abusive towards the child

  5. A family where the mother is constantly criticizing or shaming the child

  6. A family where the mother is overly dependent on the child for emotional support

  7. A family where the mother has mental health issues or addiction problems

  8. A family where the mother is in a toxic or abusive relationship with the father or partner

  9. A family where the mother is a victim of domestic violence and is unable to protect the child from harm

  10. Growing up in a culture that glorifies toxic masculinity and devalues feminine qualities

  11. Having a mother who struggles with her own wounded feminine energy and is unable to model healthy expression of it

  12. Growing up with a father who dismisses or belittles feminine qualities

  13. Experiencing sexual or physical abuse at the hands of a male figure in childhood

  14. Being raised in a family where emotions are not acknowledged or valued

  15. Growing up in poverty or with financial instability that impacts the family dynamics

  16. Being raised in a family with strict gender roles and expectations

  17. Growing up in a family where mental health is stigmatized and not addressed

  18. A family where the child is the primary caregiver for a parent or sibling

  19. Growing up in a family where education is not prioritized or valued

  20. A family where the child is adopted or in foster care, which can lead to a sense of disconnection and lack of belonging.

20 Examples of how the Father Wound Affects Our Feminine Energy

Here are 20 examples of how our early family life with our father affects our feminine energy:

  1. Growing up with a distant or emotionally unavailable father

  2. Having a father who is physically absent due to work or other commitments

  3. Having a father who is overbearing or controlling

  4. Growing up with a father who is dismissive of feminine qualities and traits

  5. Having a father who is abusive towards the child or the mother

  6. Growing up with a father who constantly criticizes or shames the child

  7. Having a father who is overly dependent on the child for emotional support

  8. Growing up with a father who struggles with his own wounded masculine energy and is unable to model healthy expression of it

  9. Having a father who is in a toxic or abusive relationship with the mother or partner

  10. Growing up with a father who is emotionally or physically unavailable due to addiction or mental health issues

  11. Having a father who is not supportive of the child's interests or passions, particularly if they are traditionally considered feminine

  12. Growing up in a family where the father is absent or not involved in the child's life, leading to a lack of masculine energy or guidance

  13. Having a father who prioritizes work or career over family life, leading to a lack of presence and emotional connection with the child

  14. Growing up with a father who reinforces harmful gender stereotypes and societal expectations

  15. Having a father who is emotionally volatile or unpredictable, leading to a lack of safety and security in the child's environment

  16. Growing up with a father who engages in toxic masculinity or machismo behavior, leading to a disconnection from one's own feminine energy and a fear of expressing it

  17. Having a father who is unable to show vulnerability or express emotions, leading to a lack of healthy emotional expression and connection with others

  18. Growing up with a father who is authoritarian or controlling, leading to a lack of autonomy and independence in the child

  19. Having a father who is dismissive of the child's emotional needs or boundaries, leading to a lack of emotional safety and trust

  20. Growing up with a father who is dismissive of the child's spiritual or intuitive side, leading to a disconnection from one's own intuition and inner wisdom.

How Ancestral Patterns and Beliefs Shape Our Relationship with Femininity

Wounded feminine energy can be passed down through generations as ancestral patterns and belief systems.

This occurs when a parent, often the mother, has unhealed wounds related to their own feminine energy that they pass on to their children.

These wounds can manifest in patterns of behavior and belief systems that are transmitted unconsciously to future generations.

For example, if a woman grew up with a mother who was disconnected from her feminine energy and expressed this through emotional suppression, the daughter may learn to suppress her own emotions as well. This pattern can then be passed down to future generations unless it is recognized and healed.

Ancestral healing work can help individuals identify and release these patterns and beliefs, allowing for a more authentic expression of feminine energy. It involves acknowledging the wounds and traumas that have been passed down and working towards healing them. This can involve practices such as meditation, energy work, and therapy.

By healing ancestral patterns and beliefs, individuals can break the cycle of wounded feminine energy and create a healthier relationship with femininity for themselves and future generations.


How to Heal Wounded Feminine Energy

1) Reconnect to your body and feel the wisdom within the sensations

As human beings, we are designed to inhabit our bodies fully, to feel and connect with our physical sensations, emotions, and intuition. However, when we carry wounds and traumas, particularly around our feminine energy, it can become challenging to be present in our bodies and feel safe in our own skin. This can manifest in various ways, such as dissociation, numbing, or disconnection from our physical selves. It can also impact our ability to connect with and express our feminine energy. In this article, we will explore why it's so hard to be fully present in our bodies when we don't feel safe in our feminine energy, and how we can begin to heal and reconnect with ourselves.

Feminine embodiment refers to the ability to fully inhabit and be present in our bodies, connecting with our physical sensations, emotions, and intuition.

Research has shown that trauma and early childhood experiences can impact our ability to be embodied and can result in disconnection from our physical selves (van der Kolk, 2014). When we hold wounded feminine energy, which can result from past traumas or societal conditioning, it can be challenging to connect with and fully embody our femininity. According to a study published in the Journal of Traumatic Stress, childhood trauma has been associated with increased disconnection from the body and decreased awareness of bodily sensations (Weintraub et al., 2017).

Furthermore, societal pressures and gender norms can also impact our ability to fully embody our feminine energy. A study published in the journal Body Image found that societal beauty standards and gender roles can lead to body dissatisfaction and a disconnection from the body (Dittmar et al., 2009). This disconnection can make it difficult to access and embrace our feminine energy.

Overall, the combination of past trauma and societal conditioning can make it challenging to fully embody and embrace our feminine energy. However, with awareness, healing, and intentional practices, it is possible to reconnect with our physical selves and embrace our feminine energy in a healthy and empowering way.

2) Release anger, grief and sadness that's blocking your heart

Being in our feminine energy requires us to be able to feel, express, and feel safe in our emotional world because femininity is often associated with emotions, intuition, and empathy. When we are unable to connect with our emotional world, it can lead to a disconnection from our feminine energy, resulting in feelings of numbness, emptiness, and disempowerment.

In order to fully embrace and embody our feminine energy, we must be willing to explore and express our emotions, even if they are uncomfortable or difficult to feel. This requires a sense of safety and security within ourselves and our environment, as well as a willingness to be vulnerable and open to the experiences of others. When we are able to connect with our emotional world in a healthy and nurturing way, we can tap into the power of our feminine energy and experience a deeper sense of connection, creativity, and intuition.

🎧 Listen to: What is heart alchemy?

Practice to connect to your heart and emotional body Step by step process to identify buried emotional pain 15 min soothing anxiety practice How to balance masculine and feminine energy

3) Heal Sexual Trauma, Embrace Your Sexual Energy and Embody Your Sacred Womb Space

As we heal, we have the opportunity to embrace our sexual energy, a potent force that resides within us. This energy, when honored and understood, becomes a catalyst for our vitality, creativity, and self-expression. By connecting with our desires, setting boundaries, and exploring pleasure on our own terms, we reclaim the power to define and embody our authentic sexuality.

Central to this healing journey is the embodiment of our sacred womb space. Regardless of our physical anatomy, the womb represents the energetic center of our feminine essence—a space of creation, intuition, and deep wisdom. By cultivating a loving and nurturing relationship with our womb, we tap into the wellspring of our feminine power. Through practices such as meditation, breathwork, and womb healing rituals, we can awaken the dormant energy within, allowing it to flow freely and harmoniously.

As we heal sexual trauma, embrace our sexual energy, and embody our sacred womb space, we embark on a transformative path of self-love, empowerment, and the restoration of our feminine energy. It is a journey that requires patience, compassion, and a commitment to our own well-being. Together, let us step into the fullness of our feminine essence, reclaiming our power, embracing our sexuality, and creating a profound sense of wholeness within ourselves.

🎧 Listen to: 14 mins guided practice to release pelvic floor tension Womb and sexual energy Sexual energy as a reflection of our self creation Guided womb meditation Womb-heart-throat axis

You might like to read:

  1. Monster vs Mother

  2. Signs that your body is holding unconscious childhood sexual abuse.

  3. What does it mean to be a Wom(b)en?

  4. How Womb Trauma Affects Your Nervous System and Your Brain

  5. How to deepen your feminine power by healing your womb

  6. Ancestral Healing: Like mother like daughter

  7. How to Deepen Your Connection the Divine Feminine

  8. Embodying the Sacred Feminine: Unlocking Inner Wisdom, Creative Power, and Spiritual Connection

  9. Daily Rituals to Harness Your Divine Feminine Energy

  10. The Spiritual Essence of Divine Feminine Energy

Deepen Your Healing:

If after reading this, you're ready to heal and embody your divine feminine energy please reach out to me.

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